Artie Lange

Detroit Opera House

Jan. 7: The New York Post is reporting today that Artie Lange landed in the hospital after stabbing himself nine times in a recent apparent suicide attempt. Despite heavy bleeding, Lange was saved by surgeons. Howard Stern this week said on his show: "We all have our demons," after Lange has been mysteriously away from the airwaves most of December. "Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He's a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don't forget how great he is," Stern adds of his longtime pal.

Lange was in town, as you'll read down below, for a benefit show recently. He and I spoke for much longer than the usual 15 minutes or so most phone interviews go for. He was incredibly sweet, super funny -- and vulnerable. Get better Artie. -- BJH

“Howard Stern Show” personality Artie Lange may seem lewd and crude, but the funny dude also has an extremely big heart.

The comedian and best-selling author said he was “almost in tears” after reading Ross Niskar’s letter a few months ago. Niskar’s poignant words about his younger brother Adam Niskar, 36, a Beverly Hills resident who was paralyzed after diving into a lake 10 years ago, really “hit home,” Lange said. 

Ross Niskar, 39, felt compelled to write after reading Lange’s book “Too Fat to Fish,” where the author, who chronicles the highs and lows of his own turbulent life, wrote about his own father, who spent his last four years hanson as a quadriplegic after falling from a roof.

“It really destroyed our family, not only emotionally but financially,” Lange said. “It was very emotional to see someone you love like that. To be paralyzed, it’s a living hell.”

Lange said Ross Niskar couldn’t believe that it was actually him calling a few months back with the news that he wanted to waive his usual booking fees and come to Detroit to offer his support.

Tonight, Lange will headline the Friends for Adam Niskar Trust benefit at the Detroit Opera House. Established in 1999, the trust raises money for Adam Niskar to cover his mounting medical expenses.

Tickets are $30-60, and VIP seats are $125. A select amount of $20 tickets were also released Thursday. Southfield-raised comedian Mike Young will open the show.

An afterparty at Small Plates in Detroit will follow the Opera House event. For more about Niskar, click on www.friendsforadam.com.

But before we hit the laugh-fest tonight and offer our support to the Niskar family, Mr. Lange did offer a couple more thoughts worth looking at.

Artie, you're a big Yankees fan, baseball guy (this interview was done right before the Detroit Tigers were knocked out by the Minnesota Twins, tear)...
B.J. let me tell you: My grandfather was in a German prison camp in WWII with a guy from Detroit and they got liberated in April of 45. They were in the German prison camp for six months and they became incredible friends, right. I’m a big Yankees fan -- the guy’s name was Bob Ford, he’s since passed on, but he was an amazing guy. He left the war and he became a big deal with the unions with the auto workers. 

In 1984, I was 17, and as a gift to my grandfather, he got tickets to game 5 of the World Series when they clinched against the (San Diego) Padres. I got to be in the middle of the Detroit riots after they won. Me and my cousin Frankie; I was 17, my cousin Frankie was 13, and we were my grandfather’s two oldest grandsons.

And as a gift to my grandfather, who was a man who couldn’t afford something like this himself, he got both of us plane tickets and he got us tickets to the game, so I was at the game. I have authentic Tigers Stadium history – the old one. I always respected the Tigers. Allen Trammel  was one of the biggest Yankee killers of all time so I got respect for the fellas up there, but I’m a Yankees fan.

I was up in Detroit doing a college gig and I was driving by with the other comedians…I don’t know when… they were building Comerica Park and we drove by there. I had just done a gig for like 300 people and I saw the Fox Theatre and in big letters it said Chris Rock, and I remember saying to myself, 'God it’d be great to play the Fox Theater in Detroit one day,' and because of being on the Howard Stern show a couples years ago, the dream came true – I had my name in the big marquee. It was cool. I took a picture of it. I signed my name right next to Frank Sinatra’s on the wall.

I don’t know if it wasn’t baseball season or we didn’t have time, but I’ve never been to Comerica Park. It’s real cool looking on the outside.

When you do a benefit show like this, do you change up your approach at all?
Just at the very beginning and the very end, but otherwise it won’t be much different. I'll probably do about an hour or so -- and I'll mention how to give more money if the Niskars want me to at the end.

Heard that there might be a follow up to your fantastic "Too Fat to Fish" book? How's that coming along?
We’re just in the infancy of writing it now. It’ll hopefully be out abut a year from now.

Alright -- well this has been rather pleasant...Before you have to go, let's talk some current events. Are you thinking about babysitting for the Gosselin kids? Are you fired up about Jay Leno at 10? Roman Polanski locked up stir up any feelings?
I don’t mind Jon and Kate, there eight kids aggravate the hell out of me. Jon and Kate seem like wonderful people. What pisses me off is that I know who Jon and Kate are. In the old days ('70s and '80s) for everyone in the country to know who you were, you had to be this talented actor.

Now, if your father was one of OJ Simpson's lawyers and you have a weird name that starts with K and you’re insane, then you got a show, and the other thing is you need to have slept with a rapper on video. ... We haven’t had one of those broads on.

The pop culture world nowadays – there’s a lot of reality television. It really is aggravating that I know who Kate Gosselin is. I really wish I didn’t, but you know, I always thought Jay Leno was an unbelievably talented comedian and as a comic and a fan of comedy, I never thought he translated onto television.

We played a clip, Chris Rock was on and it was Leno talking to Chris Rock and you know Leno’s a funny guy, but Rock is being so much funnier that is was almost like a funny guy talking to a non-funny guy. Leno, he’s just not as funny on television.

What aggravates me is the Roman Polanski thing. I love how celebrities are afraid to call him a racist. I mean do they think they’re going to be in "Chinatown II" or something?

I’m a big fan of Woody Allen. I love his early comedies. He’s made a lot of good ones recently but, I mean, the guy married his daughter. At some point you go 'whoa, he seems like a bit of a jerk.'

When someone defends Roman Polanski ... Hollywood sometimes defends their own to the point they sound stupid. 

See you Friday night, right?

.